MURDER AT SUNRISE

STACCATO REPORTS
FROM AVIAN GUNS,
A SCREAM, SCREECH,
A WHISTLE, A TWEET,
ACAPPELLA..
A BEAKED CHORUS,
CHIRPING, WARBLING.
A THRONG TWILLING
TWITTERING, CHEEPS
MACHINE GUNNED,
CHITTERS AND TRILLS.
HARMONY
GATHERED AT DAWN.
I AWAKE TO A DREAM,
A SWEET REVEILLE,
KILLING ME SOFTLY
WITH ITS REWARDING SONG.

BACK IN THE SADDLE AGAIN

I'M BACK IN THE SADDLE AGAIN, RIDING THE GRASSY RANGE,
GALLOPING ALONG ON MY MOWER WITH ITS NEW BLADES AND WELDED BRACKET THAT HAD BROKEN. OBEDIENT AS A JUST DISCIPLINED,
RECALCITRANT HORSE, MY REPAIRED STEED SHEARS OFF PATHS OF WEEDS AND GRASS GONE TO SEED. I FORGIVE IT FOR ITS BRIEF DYSFUNCTION AND FOCUS INSTEAD ON MY GENETIC FREAKISHNESS WHICH FORESWEARS SWEAT, REDDENS MY FACE AND CRIPPLES ME WHEN I INHALE POLLEN. MY NECK STIFFENS AFTER HOURS ARE MOWN AWAY, BUT I DISMOUNT TO DEFLATE AND DEACTIVATE MY RAGING HISTAMINES WITH AN ALLERGY PILL AND EYE DROPS. ROUNDUP TIME NEVER CHANGES. WHIRLING HORSEPOWER HAS RETURNED TO MY HANDS. MY LOUSY, STINKEN ALLERGY TAKES THE FUN OUT OF MY RIDES DURING ALLERGY TIME.

AGED OR AGELESS

FREE OF A GAS GRILL,
FREE OF AN OUTSTANDING BILL,
FOND OF SIPPING SHERRY,
DIPPY IN LOVE THAT'S MERRY,

I'M AGED BUT AGELESS,
KNOW WHAT TO CARESS,
HOW TRUTHS ARE TESTED,
WHAT PATRIOTS KEEP BLESSED,

FREE TO ABJURE PEERS,
FREE TO IGNORE JEERS,
FOND OF MY ONLY MAN,
DIPPY ABOUT MY NATIVE LAND.

WHAT TO REMEMBER

WHAT IS ESSENTIAL IS INVISIBLE TO THE EYE. IMPORTANT TRUTHS ARE RARELY ON DISPLAY EITHER IN PRINT OR THE PICTURES OF LOCAL AND NATIONAL NEWSPAPERS. CHRISTMAS IS COVERED AS A 'HOLIDAY.' THE SIGNIFICANCE OF MEMORIAL DAY IS RELEGATED TO A BRIEF REPORT AND PICTURE ON PAGE 3. A LOW LIFE MURDERER ON DEATH ROW FOR 20 YEARS IS PROFILED OVER A PAGE AND A HALF OF USELESS RHETORIC. YET, HOPE FOR AMERICA'S FUTURE - ON THIS MEMORIAL DAY - LIES WITH DEDICATED MEN FROM THE U.S. MILITARY ACADEMY.

WE NEED TO REMEMBER WHAT IS BEAUTIFUL, ESSENTIAL, BECAUSE WHAT'S OFTEN MADE VISIBLE IS THE UGLY. A DOCTOR IN FLORIDA THROWS HIS 2 CHILDREN TO THEIR DEATHS. TORTURE, MURDER AND CHILD MOLESTATION CHARACTERIZE THE CRIMES OF A MISSOURI COUPLE. THE LYING MURDERER FROM OHIO WHO KILLED A WOMAN IMMEDIATELY AFTER BEING RELEASED FROM SERVING 12 YEARS IN PRISON FOR ANOTHER MURDER, IS GIVEN WASTED VERBIAGE BY TWO REPORTERS WHO HAD PORED OVER THOUSANDS OF PAGES OF DOCUMENTS IN HIS DEATH ROW CASE. COLUMNS UPON COLUMNS OF A PUBLICATION THAT I PAY FOR, ARE ALSO WASTED ON REPORTS OF THE HEDONISM OF URBAN SPRAWL, CITING THREE FACTS: THE SIZE OF THE AVERAGE NEW HOME IS TWICE WHAT IT WAS IN 1970 EVEN THOUGH HOUSEHOLDS HAVE DRAMATICALLY BEEN REDUCED IN NUMBERS. LAND IS CONSUMED AT TRIPLE THE RATE OF HOMES, A TREND THAT WILL DRIVE ENVIRONMENTALISTS MAD. AUTOMOBILE USE GROWS TWICE AS FAST AS THE POPULATION, MEANING PEOPLE ARE NOT SATISFIED WITH ONE VEHICLE. OUR SOCIETY’S CULTURE FOSTERS CONSPICUOUS CONSUMPTION BY SPOILED (BUT BLESSED) AMERICANS.

BEHIND THE EYE'S FEAST OF ROT, HOWEVER, EXISTS BEAUTY IF ONE LOOKS FOR IT. THE BEAUTY OF A PATRIOTIC SOUL SACRIFICED DOING HIS DUTY FOR COUNTRY. THE BEAUTY OF BIRDS TWEETING INCESSANTLY, IF ONE CHOOSES TO HEAR THEM. THE BEAUTY OF GRASS GROWING AND GOING TO SEED, A TIME-TESTED PHENOMENA AS NATURAL AS MEN MOWING IT DOWN. THE BEAUTY OF SINGER, BEVERLY SILLS IN HER PRIME WARBLING "A KISS IN THE DARK." THE BEAUTY OF A MAN AND WOMAN ACTUALLY KNOWING HOW TO LOVE A CHILD. BEAUTY EXISTS IF WE SEEK IT EVEN THOUGH EXEMPLIFICATIONS OF REVOLTING UGLINESS OFTEN COVER THE SURFACE OF OUR LIVES.

LOUSY MOWER

AS A NEIGHBOR'S MOWS WITHIN EARSHOT, MOVING SWIFTLY ABOVE THE GROUND DECAPITATING GRASS AND GUZZLING GAS ( NOT TO THE DRIVER'S DISMAY) I THINK TO MYSELF, WHAT MUST LIFE BE LIKE FOR THE LUCKY AND PERSNICKETY? MY LOUSY, STINKING RIDING MOWER, JUST ANOTHER MACHINE IN THE LONG LINE OF LOSERS THAT HAVE ENTERED AND EXITED THE PAGES OF MY BOOK OF MECHANICAL LEMONS, IS 'IN THE SHOP'. MY GRASSES (MOSTLY WEEDS) ARE SEEDING AT 2 TO 3 FEET IN HEIGHT. MY MEMORIAL DAY WILL MEMORIALIZE MY INFERIORITY TO FELLOW HOMEOWNERS WITH NEATLY, SHORN GRASS.

NOTHING IS EXTRA-ORDINARY OR UNEXPECTED, SO WHY GET DEPRESSED? MY LOUSY, STINKING MOWER, I'VE CONCLUDED, WAS DEFECTIVE FROM ITS DEPARTURE FROM THE SHOWROOM FLOOR: FRONT END NOT HIGHER THE BACK. 2 'NEW' FLAT TIRES. A WELDED DECK BRACKET COMPROMISED. THE CUTTING DECK SO LOW THAT I HAVE NEVER UTILIZED THE 3 LOWER SETTINGS SINCE TAKEOFF. RECENTLY, CHIPPED BLADES AND DEAD BATTERY HAVE BEEN REPLACED. NOW 20% OF THE PURCHASE PRICE, ALREADY RE-USED FOR MAINTENANCE, WILL BE A PAST TENSE FIGURE IF I HOPE TO MOW AGAIN. DO I? MINDLESS MOWING, UP, DOWN AND AROUND, BOUNCING AND BORED FOR HOURS IS PROBABLY MY SECOND MOST DESPISED SUMMER CHORE AFTER SWEATING.

ON THE ESCHATOLOGICAL SCALE OF THINGS, MY LOUSY, STINKING BROKEN 20 HP. MOWER SETBACK, SHRIVELS INTO INSIGNIFICANCE. I WILL FOCUS INSTEAD ON REMEMBRANCE OF WHAT TRULY WARRANTS REMEMBRANCE AND HONOR - WAR'S FALLEN HEROES. I WILL ENJOY MY HOLIDAY BREAKFAST, LUNCH AND DINNER AND NOT 'SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF. "

STRAWBERRY FIELDS

I KNOW MY WILD STRAWBERRY FIELDS AND MY STRAWBERRY FIELDS HAVE KNOWN ME TO CRAWL AMONG WILD, RED DOTS ON HANDS AND KNEES TO GARNISH ANOTHER YEAR'S PRODUCE WHICH OFTENTIMES RESTED IN A BED OF WATER UNABSORBED AFTER SPRING RAINS. BUT THE CROP - THOUGH MEAGER - WAS EXCELLENT IN A PUNGENT FLAVOR 'OUT OF THE DOMESTICATED WORLD' OF FRUIT. I PICKED OFF THOUSANDS OF STEMS WITH A TWEEZER, COOKED UP A FEW JAMS AND COBBLERS AND PLUNKED TINY FRUIT ONTO BOWLS OF CEREAL, BUT NEVER WAS GRACED WITH LEFTOVERS FOR THE MASTER VINTNER TO CREATE BOTTLES OF STRAWBERRY WINE. ALL THESE GOOD THINGS EVENTUALLY ENDED.

ENTER THE ALTERNATIVE, ROWS OF DOMESTICATED PLANTS. I GRANT THE 'WILD' FLAVOR WAS SACRIFICED, BUT MY INTENSIVE, BEGGARY LABOR CEASED. IN MY BEDS OF GROWING PLANTS, WEEDS REARED THEIR UGLY AND PROFUSE HEADS. THEY PROVIDED HOURS OF OUTDOOR, DOWN-TO-EARTH EXERCISE. PICKING THE FRUIT SIMPLY INVOLVED PLUCKING, LIFE-SIZED RED BALLS. POUNDS REPLACED OUNCES OF A HARVEST AND MULTIPLE CONTAINERS WERE STORED IN A FREEZER. I EVENTUALLY CLINKED MY GLASS TO A PARTNER'S GLASS OF STRAWBERRY WINE, LIKE A PLEASANT MUSIC TO MY MOUTH.
WHAT DID THE BEATLES KNOW ABOUT STRAWBERRY FIELDS?

IMMIGRATION QUAGMIRE

THE JURY'S CONVICTION OF KEN LAY AND JEFF SKILLING IN THE ENRON SCANDAL SUPPOSEDLY SENT A MESSAGE THAT CEO'S CAN'T HIDE BEHIND LAWYERS OR ACCOUNTANTS, THAT THEY ARE NOT ABOVE THE LAW. BUT BI-PARTISAN POLITICIANS IN THE HOUSE AND SENATE THINK ARE. THEY PUSHED FOR THESE TWO CORPORATE CROOKS TO BE TRIED QUICKLY, BUT DEMUR OVER REP. WILLIAM JEFFERSON OF LOUISIANA’S, GUILT FOR ACCEPTING BRIBES AND SEQUESTERING EVIDENCE. THEY CONTRADICT THEMSELVES WHEN QUESTIONING INTRUSION INTO INDIVIDUAL PRIVACY RIGHTS WITHOUT WARRANTS ON THE ONE HAND AND THE RIGHT OF THE POLICE TO INTRUDE WITH JUST CAUSE AND A WARRANT ON THE OTHER. TOSSING CONSISTENCY AND COMMON SENSE ASIDE AND GIRDING THEMSELVES SOLELY WITH THE CLOTH OF POLITICAL GAIN, OUR ELECTED REPRESENTATIVES IN WASHINGTON PUBLICALLY STRUT THEIR GOVERNING STUPIDITY. NO WAY CAN THEY BE TRUSTED TO HANDLE THE HOT ISSUE OF IMMIGRATION AND SOLVE THIS QUAGMIRE. AS A CONTRARIAN I PRESENT ALTERNATIVE QUESTIONS.

1. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ADDING MILLIONS OF IMMIGRANTS? THE FACT THAT THEY ARE ILLEGAL OR THE DOUBT THAT AMERICA CAN EXPAND TO ACCOMMODATE THEM? ERGO, LEGALIZE CURRENT RESIDENTS, RAISE THE LEGAL QUOTAS, EXPECT ALL IMMIGRANTS TO LEARN ENGLISH, ENTER THE JOB MARKETS, PAY TAXES AND REJECT WELFARE. WHEN THE ANNUAL QUOTAS ARE FILLED, CLOSE THE BORDERS AND ENFORCE THEM BY MILITARY MEANS (INCLUDING SHOOT TO KILL ORDERS). THROW CAUTION TO THE FOUR WINDS JUST AS WAS DONE WITH PREVIOUS WAVES OF WILLING IMMIGRANTS.

2. WHO WILL BEAR THE CHILDREN FOR THE FUTURE? NOT THOSE WHO NOW LIMIT OUR POPULATION BY SELECTIVE ABORTIONS AND USELESS PARENTING. WHO WILL PAY FOR SOCIAL SECURITY WHICH WILL EVENTUALLY BANKRUPT ITSELF THANKS TO WAVES OF INCOMING RETIREES AND ONLY A TWO TO ONE RATIO OF WORKERS TO NON-WORKERS?

WHO ARE NO BETTER THAN THE MILLIONS OF ELITIST AMERICANS WHO NOW PROFESS A LAZY, SPOILED AND ARROGANT LIFESTYLE AND VESTIGIAL RACISM AGAINST INFERIORS? WHO ARE THE SO-CALLED ‘INFERIORS’ EVEN THOUGH OTHER 'INFERIOR' AMERICANS WHO ARE LAZY, SPOILED AND ARROGANT ARE WILLING TO DREDGE UP RACIST SINS OF THE PAST TO EXCUSE WORK AND PERFORMANCE IN THE FUTURE? WHO WILL BE SUBJECTED TO PREJUDICE INHERENT IN HUMAN NATURE NO MATTER WHAT THEIR ACHIEVEMENTS OR THEIR CRIMINAL ACTIVITIES? THE COLLECTIVE ANSWER? THE IMMIGRANTS.

AMERICANS TODAY ARE NO 'PERFECT DARLINGS.' OUR PRIORITIES AND MORALS ARE COMPROMISED. MORE VOTES WERE CAST FOR THE AMERICAN IDOL THAN THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. MURDERS HIT HOME DAILY - AS ONE DID IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD THIS PAST WEEK WITH THE STABBING DEATH OF A CHILD BY A DERANGED DAD. TOSSING CAUTION INTO THE WIND, WHY NOT TRUST IN 10 MILLION IMMIGRANTS EACH YEAR TO ADVANCE OUR COUNTRY AND THEN AS FORMER PRESIDENT RONALD REAGAN SAID, "TRUST BUT VERIFY," VERIFY THAT THEY USE LEGAL MEANS? IS AMERICA DEMOCRATIC, EXPANSIVE AND INNOVATIVE ENOUGH TO HANDLE IT? THE ALTERNATIVE IS TO FRENCHIFY OR FALL BACK.

DISCIPLINE

IN CHAPTER 104 OF MOBY DICK, HERMAN MELVILLE WROTE, "TO PRODUCE A MIGHTY BOOK YOU MUST CHOOSE A MIGHTY THEME." THIS TRUISM MAY BE APPLIED TO MELVILLE'S NOVEL AND TO THE BIBLE, ONE OF THE WORLD'S MOST IMPORTANT BOOKS. TO PARAPHRASE THE AUTHOR SLIGHTLY, I SAY "TO PRODUCE A STRONG ADULT, YOU MUST INSTILL SOME STRONG DISCIPLINE."

A STRONG ADULT WITH AN IQ TOWERING ABOVE MINE, SUGGESTED TO ME THAT THERE IS AN INVERSE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN AN ATTITUDE OF RESPECT IN YOUTH AND THE ADMINISTRATION OF DISCIPLINE IN THE 'OLD DAYS' AND THE ATTITUDE OF DISRESPECT AND THE LACK OF DISCIPLINE IN YOUTH TODAY. REMEMBER WHEN THE NUNS WOULD WHOP AN OUT-OF-LINE YOUNGSTER ACROSS THE BACK OF THE HEAD? MORAL SYNAPSES AWAKE! WAS HER SCIENTIFIC AND PHILOSOPHICAL POINT. AND YET CHILDREN WERE INGRAINED WITH A HIGHER DEGREE OF COMMON SENSE, GOOD MANNERS, TOLERANCE AND APPROPRIATE GUILT THAN THE BOORS IN PUBLIC SCHOOL CLASSROOMS TODAY. TO HELP SOLVE THIS PROBLEM, STUDENTS MUST NOW PARTICIPATE IN A "RESPECT" INITIATIVE. I KID YOU NOT. A GRAMMAR SCHOOL'S NEW PROGRAM AIMS TO TEACH R..E...S...P...E...C...T..., EACH LETTER OF THE WORD REPRESENTING A DIFFERENT ASPECT OF CONCEPT.

MY SMART, STRONG OBSERVER OF MODERN CULTURE WAS RAISED FATHERLESS, IN AN ALL FEMALE HOME. YET SUCH DATA (USED TODAY FOR EXCUSES) WAS IRRELEVANT BACK WHEN THE ATTITUDE OF RESPECT PERMEATED THE PREVAILING CULTURE AND CHILDREN WERE BEST SEEN AND NOT HEARD. ADULTHOOD WAS TIME ENOUGH TO RENDER ONE'S OPINIONS IN THE WORLD. ADULTS INDULGED NO NEGOTIATIONS OVER DISCIPLINARY TACTICS WITH UNDERAGE CHILDREN. SADLY , THE REVERSE IS OFTEN CONSIDERED GOOD PARENTING TODAY. IN THE 'OLD DAYS' THE VIRTUE OF RESPECT WAS PLANTED AT HOME AND TRANSFERRED INTO THE SCHOOLS. AT PRESENT, IT HAS APPARENTLY NEVER GERMINATED.

NOW THAT THE 'BLACK, VEILED MONSTERS' (NUNS) HAVE SETTLED INTO THEIR RETIREMENT VILLAGES, POLITICAL CORRECTNESS AND PERMISSIVENESS HAVE REPLACED THEM AT THE HEAD OF CLASSES. ARE PROGRAMS LIKE "RESPECT" UP TO THE JOB OF REVERSING THE TREND? WHO ARE WE KIDDING? THE NUN'S NEVER DID.

FAT-FREE YOGURT

IN A WORLD TURNED UPSIDE DOWN WHEN PRESIDENT BUSH AND NOT SADAAM HUSSEIN IS PUBLIC ENEMY NO.1 AND ERRONEOUS INTELLIGENCE ABOUT WMD'S IS DEFINED AS LIES, FAT-FREE YOGURT CAN PROVIDE A MAJOR UPLIFT FOR DOWNCAST SPIRITS. I HAVE ALWAYS KNOWN THAT YOGURT'S CULTURES PLAYED INTO GOOD NUTRITION, BUT I HAVE NEVER LIKED PLAIN YOGURT'S TASTE. I HAD ONLY ENJOYED SWEETENED, FRUITY-FLAVORED OR VANILLA CUPS. UNTIL NOW... PURCHASED BY AN ACCIDENT THAT WAS PROBABLY WROUGHT BY PROVIDENTIAL DESIGN, I WAS FORCED TO EITHER DISPENSE THE YUCKY WHITE SLOP TO THE EVER-READY OMNIVORE, OUR PET DOG, OR TRY IT IN A FOOD. I CHOSE THE LATTER. LIKE THE 'ROAD NOT TRAVELED' IN ROBERT FROST'S POEM, THE CHOICE HAS MADE ALL THE DIFFERENCE. ‘GOING FOR IT’ YOGURT THAT IS, IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT IN MY FOOD PREPARATIONS NOW. TRY THESE IDEAS IF YOU PLAN TO EVER EAT A DELICIOUS MEAL AGAIN. WARNING: DON'T CONSUME IT COLD AND STRAIGHT FROM THE CONTAINER, IT'S SOUR AND WATERY.

BREAKFAST: A TABLESPOON ADDED TO A BOWL OF CEREAL WITH MILK AND/OR FRUIT. TABLESPOON IN BOWL OF OATMEAL PREPARED WITH MILK. TEASPOON ADDED WITH A DASH OF WATER FOR OMELETTE. TABLESPOON ADDED WITH WATER TO PANCAKE BATTER. TABLESPOON ADDED TO MILK AND ORANGE JUICE WHEN PREPARING BATTER FOR CREPES.

SALADS: TABLESPOON OR TWO ADDED TO ANY TYPE OF SALAD SUCH AS EGG SALAD, POTATO SALAD, SALMON SALAD, TUNA SALAD, PEA SALAD, BEAN SALAD, HAM SALAD, COLE SLAW, ETC. ALONG WITH THE MAYONNAISE (NEVER MIRACLE WHIP) WHICH PORTION MAY BE CUT BACK TO LIGHTEN IT UP AND PROVIDE A TANG.

SOUPS: TABLESPOON PER SERVING OF SOUP. ANY VARIETY. I'VE PUT A DOLLOP OF YOGURT INTO TOMATO, BEAN, SPLIT PEA, ONION, CELERY, ASPARAGUS, BROCCOLI, CHICKEN BOTH CREAMED AND BROTH, WITH OR WITHOUT NOODLES, ETC. WHICH EVER VARIETY TURNS YOU ON, THE ADDITIONAL YOGURT WILL INTENSIFY THE EXPERIENCE.

MAIN DISH; TEASPOON TO A SERVING OF CHILI, CASSEROLE, TORTILLA.

DIPS FOR CHIPS, PUDDINGS, RICE - DROP YOGURT IN TOO.

POTATO: TO THE PIECE DE RESISTANCE - MASHED POTATOES, REAL OR BOXED FLAKES - ADD TWO TABLESPOONS ALONG WITH THE MILK, MARGARINE , SALT AND PEPPER FOR CREAMING. I GUARANTEE IT WILL CONVERT A MASHED POTATO HATER (AND I KNOW ONE) TO A POTATO EATER THE 1ST TIME SERVED.

I'D LIKE TO HEAR ABOUT WHAT YOU TRY?

SIMILITUDE

GOLDEN HORIZON
OF WEEDS IN FALLOW
FEAST FOR MY EYES
FOOD FOR THE BEES.

RUBY HORIZON
ANTICIPATING DUSK
WHEN FLUTTERING BATS
DEVOUR BUGS.

LIMITLESS HORIZONS
ARE LINES IN BOOKS,
MY ID'S AMBROSIA
MY DAILY FOOD.

WHAT FORM PRAYER

IS TEACHING A CHILD TO PRAY MORE IMPORTANT THAN TEACHING HIM OR HER TO READ? A SISTER THETIS (BE WARY OF PREACHERS WITH STRANGE NAMES) THOUGHT SO; IT CLINCHED HER CASE FOR FREQUENT PRAYER TO GOD. A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD CHARACTERIZES THE UNITED PENTECOSTAL CHURCH TO WHICH SHE BELONGED. CHRISTIAN PENTECOSTALS PREACH THAT HEALTH AND WEALTH WILL FLOW TO THOSE WHO SUPPLICATE GOD AND TITHE TO HIS ASSEMBLY ON EARTH. SISTER THETIS COMES FROM THIS SIMPLE, EMOTION BASED TRADITION, A PERSON SELF-DESCRIBED AS "SIMPLE THINKING." I DISPUTE SIMPLIFICATION BECAUSE IT APPEALS TO THE MAN'S BASIC INSTINCT TO "SEEK THE EASY WAY OUT."

MAN, I CONTEND IS A COMPLICATED BEING WITH RESIDUAL BEHAVIORS FROM OUR ANCESTORS, THE CHIMPS, BUT WITH HIGHER FACULTIES WONDROUS WITH POSSIBILITIES SUCH AS SPEECH, READING AND THOUGHT. DOES NOT OUR 'HIGHER' NATURE CALL FOR AN ENHANCED DESTINY? PRAYER, TALKING WITH GOD IS A SIMPLER FORM OF COMMUNICATION THAN READING OR INTELLECTUAL PURSUIT. I CONTEND THAT MAN'S TELEOLOGY SHOULD EXIT LIFE ON A HIGHER PLANE INTELLECTUALLY THAN HE ENTERED IT.

ALSO, MEN AND WOMEN CAN BE MISMANAGED OR MISLED BY PRAYERS. SOME FOLLOWERS OF THE KORAN PROVE IT. ALLAH SAID, VIA MOHAMMED, "O TRUE BELIEVERS, TAKE YOUR NECESSARY PRECAUTIONS AGAINST YOUR ENEMIES, AND EITHER GO FORTH TO WAR IN SEPARATE PARTIES, OR GO FORTH ALL TOGETHER IN A BODY." ENTER THE MUSLIM TERRORISTS WITH WEAPONS BRANDISHED. A THINKING CHIMP READING THIS EXHORTATION COULD LIFT THE VEIL FROM IT AND RATIONALLY CONCLUDE THAT ALLAH'S WORDS ARE IMMORAL, INHUMANE NONSENSE.

OF COURSE, RELIGION AND PRAYER PROVIDE ROOTED MEANING TO OUR LIVES, BUT I CONTEND THAT READING IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN PRAYING BECAUSE IT IS, PER SE, A FORM OF PRAYER. IT DEMONSTRATES THAN WE ARE MAXIMIZING OUR PERSONHOOD AND GOD-GIVEN TALENTS; REACHING BEYOND CHIMP BECAUSE A CHIMP ELEVATED TO HUMAN STATUS MAY PRAY WITHOUT THE ABILITY TO READ. FAITH MAY PRECEDE REASON. WE ARE WORKING, WORKING, WORKING TO IMPROVE OUR LIVES, NOT JUST TAKING THE EASY, EMOTIONALLY SATISFYING WAY OUT.

DR. LAURA'S CHOICE

IS ANYONE OUT THERE IN THE ETHER WHO WOULD LIKE TO JOIN ME IN THE CAMPAIGN TO FORCE DR. LAURA SCHLESSINGER TO CHOOSE? I AM ENRAGED BEYOND ALL MEASURE. I WILL NOT SHRIVE HER FOR IGNORING MY PENETRATING QUESTION ABOUT THE IMPOSSIBILITY OF ALL MOTHERS TO STAY-AT-HOME TO RAISE THEIR CHILDREN UNTIL THEY ARE 18. THIS IS IN SPITE OF MY ADMIRATION FOR HER AND HER TOTEMIC CAUSE - THE WELFARE OF CHILDREN.

LEON BLUM SAID, "LIFE DOES NOT GIVE ITSELF TO ONE WHO TRIES TO KEEP ALL ITS ADVANTAGES AT ONCE. I HAVE OFTEN THOUGHT MORALITY MAY PERHAPS CONSIST SOLELY IN THE COURAGE OF MAKING A CHOICE." ARE YOU LISTENING, DR. LAURA? YOUR ADVOCACY FOR STAY-AT-HOME MOMS AFTER CHILDBEARING, RESTS UPON A CHOICE. TRUE, BUT IMMORALITY IN THESE CHOICES WILL REAR ITS UGLY HEAD IF WOMEN FOLLOW YOUR COUNSEL. TO PREVENT PREGNANCY, IMMORAL MEANS WOULD BE EMPLOYED. CONDOMS, BIRTH CONTROL PILLS, ABORTIONS. ALSO, TO FORESTALL COMMITMENT TO OFFSPRING UNTIL ONE CHOOSES, INVOLVES SELFISHNESS AND PERSONAL GRATIFICATION. I TAKE YOU TO TASK FOR ADVOCATING ADULT CHOICES WHICH WILL INEVITABLY LEAD TO SINS.

THE CHILDREN CREATED FROM PROPER CHOICES, WILL, ACCORDING TO YOUR ADVICE, BE CHILDREN WANTED AND LOVED. AGAIN DAMN DATA REAR THEIR UGLY HEADS. IF THE 80/20 RULE APPLIES, A MERE 20%OF MOTHERS WILL DEMONSTRATE AN ABILITY TO MOTHER. THE MAJORITY DON'T HAVE A CLUE. WHAT TO DO WITH THE QUOTIDIAN GRIND OF HOME-MAKING, BUT WILL PREFER TO GADABOUT. 80% WILL EITHER ABUSE, SPOIL, OVER-PROTECT OR NEGLECT THEIR CHILDREN WHILE 20% WILL PROPERLY RAISE A CHILD. SOME WOMEN ARE BORN MOTHERS; SOME CAN NEVER BE SUFFICIENTLY MADE. LET'S GIVE YOU A BIG HAND FOR NON-STOP TRYING, DR. LAURA, BUT YOU OVERLOOK FACTS FROM YOUR IVORY TOWER.

IS ANYONE OUT THERE TO DEMAND THAT DR. LAURA ANSWER MY QUESTION? IF ALL WOMEN MUST STAY-AT-HOME AS MOMS, WHAT PURPOSE WOULD THERE BE FOR A WOMAN TO PURSUE HIGHER EDUCATION, AN INTELLECTUAL LIFE, A PROFESSION, AN EXPANSION OF CHARACTER? NONE! FOLLOWING THE 80/20 RULE AGAIN, OUT OF 100% OF WOMAN IN THE HOME UNTIL THE CHILDREN ARE 18, 20% WHO WOULD HAVE CHOSEN A CAREER AND CHILDREN WOULD BE DENIED.

THE ELITIST MENTALITY OF DR. LAURA WEIGHS IN HERE. SHE CHOSE TO WAIT UNTIL LATER IN LIFE TO BEAR ONE SON. SHE FIRST CHOSE TO PURSUE HIGHER EDUCATIONAL DEGREES AND A CAREER. SHE THEN CHOSE TO STAY-AT-HOME WITH HER CHILD. BETWEEN THE LINES I READ CHOICES THAT WERE SELFISH AND - I DON'T KNOW HOW SHE MANAGED IT - PROBABLY IMMORAL.

IN 2005 I FAXED DR. LAURA A NOTE POSING MY QUESTION ABOUT THE MORAL DILEMMA SHE PRESENTS. NO ANSWER. IN JANUARY OF 2006 I MAILED HER A LETTER WITH THE SAME RESULT. IN MAY 2006 I E-MAILED ANOTHER MISSIVE. BECAUSE SHE UTILIZES SCREENERS TO CENSOR HER MAIL, DR. LAURA PROBABLY NEVER READ ANY OF MY NOTES, BUT I RECEIVED A BRIEF REPLY TO MY 3RD ATTEMPT WHICH SAID, "ADULTHOOD IS ALL ABOUT CHOICES."

SO CHOOSE, DR. LAURA, CHOOSE TO EXPLAIN HOW ONE SHOULD NOT GET PREGNANT IF IT IS THE WILL OF GOD (IN THE CONTEXT OF MARRIAGE, OF COURSE)? EXPLAIN WHAT PERCENTAGE OF WOMEN WILL REMAIN VIRGINS AND UNMARRIED UNTIL THEY ARE READY TO STAY-AT-HOME FOR 18 YEARS? CHOOSE TO ANSWER ME AS AN ADULT AND NOT CHILDISHLY FEND ME OFF AS INSIGNIFICANT.

IN HIS GOSPEL, ST. JOHN REMINDS US THAT GOD SAID "IT WAS NOT YOU WHO CHOSE ME, BUT I WHO CHOSE YOU." CHOOSING TO FALL IN LOVE, GET MARRIED AND LET GOD DECIDE WHEN TO BLESS A UNION WITH CHILDREN IS GOOD. CHOOSING TO STAYING AT HOME FOR 18 YEARS. AND 18 YEARS AND 18 YEARS, AND 18 YEARS AND 18 YEARS - IF 5 CHILDREN ARE PRODUCED - IS NOT BETTER. PERHAPS ANOTHER SOLUTION IS BEST.

I DARE YOU TO CHOOSE TO ADDRESS MY ISSUE. DOES ANYONE ELSE WANT AN ANSWER TO THIS FROM DR. LAURA SCHLESSINGER? BOMBARD HER AT drlaura.com TREAT ME TO HER RESPONSE IF YOU RECEIVE ONE.

SHALLOW

SHALLOW IS DEFINED AS SUPERFICIAL, HAVING LITTLE KNOWLEDGE, NOT PROFOUND, WHERE THE BOTTOM IS NOT FAR FROM THE SURFACE. THE WORD IS PROBABLY FROM A MIDDLE ENGLISH WORD FOR SHOAL, WHERE SCHOOLS OF FISH SWIM. WHO MIGHT PERSONIFY THIS TOTALITY OF BEING? WHO TODAY SAID THAT WOMEN WHO WOULD RATHER HAVE ANOREXIC THAN OBESE CHILDREN WERE "SHALLOWER THAN JOHN KERRY'S VISION," BUT IRONICALLY DID NOT CATCH THE IRONY OF HIS STATEMENT?

I BEGIN EACH DAY WITH THE VERBAL STATIC OF GLENN BECK'S SHALLOWNESS. HE A RADIO TALK SHOW HOST WHOSE NATIONAL PROGRAM IS THE THIRD MOST LISTENED TO IN THE COUNTRY. WHAT FURTHER CAN BE SAID ABOUT AN A.D.D. AFFLICTED FORTY- SOMETHING ADDICTED TO POPULAR TELEVISION PROGRAMS SUCH AS "24", "AMERICAN IDOL" AND "DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES," CURRENT HOLLYWOOD MOVIE GOING AND NOW TO HIS "FEAR FACTOR," HIS PHYSICAL APPEARANCE (WEIGHT) BECAUSE HE HAS A NIGHTTIME TELEVISION NEWS SHOW?

POOR GLENN. CAN'T FINISH A BOOK, CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT HIS PUBLIC, COULDN'T WAIT TO CREATE A CHILD AS FATE INTENDED. RICH GLENN WHOSE SPONSORS OF HIS RADIO SHOW, LIKE RUSH LIMBAUGH'S, ADVERTISE NOTHING THAT COMMON FOLK CAN AFFORD, COMMON PEOPLE, THAT BOTH GLENN AND RUSH PURPORT TO REPRESENT, OR DO THEY? RICH GLENN WHO WANTS TO "HAVE IT ALL" BUT OFTEN RHAPSODIZES LIKE THE BUDDHA WHO DESIRES NOTHING. SHALLOWNESS, HOWEVER, APPARENTLY HAS POPULAR APPEAL. THE FOLLOWERS OF MR. BECK ADMIRE THE TRANSPARENCIES OF RELIGIOUS AND CONSERVATIVE CONVICTIONS. PERHAPS THEY RELATE TO A DEPTH THAT IS NOT FAR FROM THE TOP, IN A SHOAL INHABITED BY "REAL" AMERICA?

A BOYS TOY

A GOOD 'OLE BOY PASSED IN REVIEW A FEW HUNDRED FEET FROM MY WINDOW ASTRIDE HIS CHOSEN STEED, CAPARISONED FOR WORK, NOT WAR. NO SPURS WERE REQUIRED, JUST AN IGNITION SWITCH, A POPPED CLUTCH, A CHUG, CHUG, TO POWER FORTH. BEAST WAS OBVIOUSLY APPRECIATED BY THE MAN ACCORDING TO HIS ABILITY AND UNDERSTOOD WITHIN HIS CAPACITY. THERE WAS NO DENYING THE FRISSON OF THIS MASTER'S FIRST SPRING RIDE. WHAT A DYNAMIC DUO! A KING OF THE FATE OF HIS HEAP OF MOTORIZED METAL AND THE TRACTOR HE TRUSTS, UNDISPUTED KING OF THE ROWS.

LAMEST EXCUSE

PAUL MCCARTNEY SHOULD HAVE LEARNED WHAT TIMOTHY, THE BRITISH TURTLE KNEW OVER 200 YEARS AGO, THAT "INSTINCT TEACHES WHAT REASON LEARNS TOO LATE." PAUL'S INTUITION COULD HAVE INFORMED HIM THAT THE ONLY PERSON TO BLAME FOR THE FAILURE OF HIS BRIEF MARRIAGE IS HIMSELF. THE EXCUSE THAT THE MEDIA'S INTERFERENCE CAUSED ITS COLLAPSE IS THE LAMEST EXCUSE OF ALL. TO QUOTE TIMOTHY AGAIN, MR. MCCARTNEY'S REASON WAS A "WILL-O'-THE-WISP. INSTINCT A RELIC WITHIN." MARRIED 4 YEARS, WITH A CHILD BY A GIRL HALF HIS AGE THIS EX-BEATLE BLASPHEMES EVERY RESPECTABLE MID-LIFE CRISIS - IF THERE IS SUCH A BUG. WHAT AN ASS! WHAT AN INSULT TO LOVE BURIED FOREVER WITH HIS FIRST WIFE. THE AARP'S NEWS MAGAZINE, (AMERICAN ASSOCIATION OF RETIRED PEOPLE) HAS PROFILED THIS IMMATURE, SELF-CENTERED FOOL AS A BASTION AND BEST-REPRESENTATION OF THE OLDER ADULT. POOH! LIBERALS AND PROGRESSIVES WHO SYMPATHIZE WITH THE VALUES REPRESENTED IN THIS PUBLICATION WOULD NEVER HOLD UP A CELEBRITY COUPLE MARRIED "FOREVER" LIKE PAUL NEWMAN AND JOANNE WOODWARD. TOO MAINSTREAM. TOO MORAL. I HAVE NEVER HAD ANY APPRECIATION FOR OR INTEREST IN THE GROUP OF 4 FROM ACROSS THE OCEAN. YET MY MARITAL INSTINCTS ARE IN TUNE WITH REASON. SINCE I CAN NAME NONE OF THE BEATLES' SONGS I CAN'T PUN ON AN APPROPRIATE TITLE. ANY SUGGESTIONS OUT THERE?

MY BOUQUET

USING MY MENTAL ACUITY AS WELL AS MY SENSES, I'LL DESCRIBE THE STATUS OF MY MOTHER'S DAY BOUQUET.

ONE TALL, HEAVY, CLEAR GLASS VASE, ENCIRCLED WITH A NYLON, PALE PURPLE RIBBON TERMINATING IN BIG BOW, HOLDING THIS CONCERT:

1 STEM WITH GREEN LEAVES AND BUDS,
2 PURPLE IRIS, EACH WIRED FOR STRENGTH,
3 TALL, MAGENTA STATTICE STALKS,
3 FRILLY FERNS ON STEMS,
10 DWARF LEMON YELLOW IRISES, 3 INNER PETALS FLECKED WITH BRONZE,
14 LARGE, PALE PINK DAISIES, FULL-FACED AND PARTIALLY OPENED,
AND:

3 GIANT STARGAZER LILIES, ONE BUDDING, ONE INCIPIENT TO UNFOLDING AND ONE IN FULL BLOOM, LET ME ELABORATE UPON THE MARVELOUS 'BEST IN SHOW.'

A FLOWER 9 INCHES IN DIAMETER WITH 6 PETALS, DEEP ROSE WITH WHITE FLUTED EDGES AND PRICKLED TOWARD THE COROLLA, DISPLAYING 6 WOBBLY ANTHERS, MAHOGANY WITH A YELLOW CENTER STRIPS, DRIPPING RUSTY POLLEN AND 1 LAVENDER TOPPED STIGMA, OOZING NECTAR, EMANATING A FRESH, SPRING SCENT WHICH PERMEATES A SMALL ROOM.

A BEAUTIFUL BOUQUET? RATHER, A WONDERFUL ONE, A GIFT REPLETE WITH WONDER. I AWAIT THE BLOOM OF THE OTHER 2 LILIES.

5-19-06 UPDATE, 2ND FLOWER IN BLOOM. DOUBLE-DUTY PERFUME. THIRD BUD APPROACHING READINESS. FUSCHIA STATTICE STALKS OPENING TOO.

CHEF/COOK

WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A CHEF AND A COOK? AFTER LEARNING THE DETAILS OF CHEF, JULIA CHILD'S LIFE AND CAREER AND MENTALLY COMPARING THEM WITH THE GUSTATORY ACCOMPLISHMENTS OF TRADITIONAL, SOUTHERN COOKS LIKE A BLACK, CLEORA BUTLER OR A WHITE, MARJORIE KINNAN RAWLINGS, I'LL TAKE 'REAL EATING' EVERY TIME. FOR BOTH THE CHEF AND COOK, ART COMBINES WITH SCIENCE AT MEALTIME. BUT FOR THE CHEF, MEAL PREPARATION AND PRESENTATION AN ARTIFICE AS OPPOSED TO THE AMOUNT OF THE SUBSTANCES CONSUMED. FOR THE COOK, NATURE'S DIVERSE INGREDIENTS PROVIDE THE GROUNDWORK FOR APPEALING, ETHNIC EDIBLES. COMPLICATED DESCRIBES THE RENDITIONS OF A CHEF. SIMPLY DELICIOUS, THOSE OF A COOK. ELITE VS. BOURGEOIS. MASTERFUL VS. MOTHERLY. BUTTER AND CREAM ARE UTILIZED FROM DUAL PERSPECTIVES. PERHAPS IT'S MY HAPPY MEMORY OF RAW, JERSEY CREAM THAT WILL NEVER DISTANCED ME FROM MEALS ROOTED IN THE REALITIES OF SENSE AND COMMON SENSE.

TO COLLEEN

IT'S MOTHER'S DAY AND TO MY RECENTLY MARRIED DAUGHTER I OFFER THIS BRIEF GIFT OF ADVICE, ALTHOUGH ADVICE IS AN INCENDIARY WORD TO YOUTH.

1. LEARN THE MEANING OF POOR IN SPIRIT, WHETHER THIS BE TRANSLATED AS COMMON SENSE CHEAPNESS AT ALL TIMES OR BE TRANSLATED AS HUMILITY BY YOUR ACKNOWLEDGMENT OF YOUR UNWORTHINESS IN THE EYES OF GOD. GRANTED, THIS IS PREDICATED ON BELIEF IN GOD; NOT GRANTED IS THE CHOICE TO MAINTAIN THIS LOWLINESS AND SUBMISSION TO THE VICISSITUDES OF LIFE.

2. READ DR. LAURA SCHLESSINGER'S BOOK, THE PROPER CARE AND FEEDING OF HUSBANDS. HAD IT BEEN WRITTEN IN MY DAY, AND HAD I READ IT, IT WOULD HAVE HELPED ME TO SAVE A RECIPIENT FROM ALL THE MISERY I INFLICTED OVER THE YEARS.

3. BE HAPPY (YOU CAN'T MAKE IT HAPPEN).
LOVE, MOM

POOR IN SPIRIT

THE MEANING OF THE BEATITUDE, "BLESSED ARE THE POOR IN SPIRIT" HAS ELUDED ME BECAUSE OF THE DIFFICULTY OF INTERPRETATION, BUT CLARIFICATION CAME TO ME AS I WAS PLANTING MY SPRING SEEDS. TO BE POOR IN SPIRIT MEANS TO "THINK CHEAP." IF ONE TEA BAG CAN BE STEEPED TO SERVE TWO, IF IT SAVES MONEY TO PURCHASE SEEDS RATHER THAN STARTED PLANTS FOR A GARDEN, IF LIBRARY BOOKS CAN BE CHECKED OUT FOR FREE IN CONTRAST TO PURCHASING THEM, IF 10 HRS. OF MUSIC AS SATISFYING AS A $100.00 CONCERT TICKET, CAN BE HAD FOR $9.00 FROM GOODWILL INDUSTRIES, IF TAPWATER IS FREE, IF AN OPEN WINDOW SUFFICES AS AIR FRESHENER, IF A DIURNAL SHOWER WASTES WATER, IF $3.00 A POUND OR MORE IS UNACCEPTABLE AND OUTRAGEOUS FOR THE PRICE OF FISH OR MEAT, IF A SLIGHTLY USED VEHICLE ALWAYS SAVES THE BUYER $1,000'S OF DOLLARS OVER A NEW ONE, AND THE BARGAIN IS EVEN GREATER WITH CASH - IF BEING CHEAP (ECONOMICAL) EQUATES WITH COMMON SENSE AND A REFUSAL TO SQUANDER MONEY NEEDLESSLY, THEN WELCOME TO THE WORLD VIEWED THROUGH POVERTY OF SPIRIT. THE POOR IN SPIRIT, BY THE WAY, WILL IRONICALLY, GET RICH. THEY WILL INEVITABLY ACCUMULATE MATERIAL AND SPIRITUAL WEALTH FROM THEIR WATCHFULNESS, AND 'ABIDE' IN PEACE, AS THE GREEK WORD ORIGINALLY INTENDED. THEIR KINGDOM OF HEAVEN WILL BE AWARDED TO THE GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANTS OF CHEAPNESS, I.E. POOR IN SPIRIT, WHO DID NOT WASTE TIME OR TALENTS ON EARTH.

THE RACE CARD

SHAKESPEARE SAID IT BEST AND FIRST, "KILL ALL THE LAWYERS." IMAGINE IF YOU WILL, A FEW BLACK CITIZENS FILING A LAWSUIT AGAINST A CITY BECAUSE THE CITY 'TORE DOWN' THEIR CRACK HOUSE WHICH WAS WELL PATRONIZED BUT WHICH ILL-SERVED THE COMMUNITY FOR YEARS. ARRESTS FOR DRUGS, ALCOHOL, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, ETC. NOT WITHSTANDING. WOULD PROFIT, WHITE GUILT, REVENGE OR SIMPLE CORRUPTNESS MOTIVATE THE PROSECUTION IN THIS CASE?

SUCH A SCENARIO WOULD EXEMPLIFY THE PRESENT DAY EXCESSIVE AND IRRATIONAL BELIEF OF BLACKS IN, AND ADVOCACY FOR, THEIR SUPERIORITY OVER THE WHITE RACE. YES, RACISM. HAS WHITE GUILT REGARDING RACISM PROVIDED THEM WITH INSPIRATION OR ARE THEY JUST GETTING EVEN? WHITES ALREADY READILY ACKNOWLEDGE BLACK SUPERIORITY IN SPORTS AND ENTERTAINMENT. MY IMAGINED BLACK LITIGANTS HATE THE WHITES WHO UPHOLD LAWS. THEY HAVE NO SHAME THANKS TO THEIR LAWYERS, HOWEVER, REVERSE RACISM WOULD TAKE CENTER COURT. WHAT COLOR ARE SUCH LAWYERS SPAWNED BY THEIR OWN MISCEGENATION IN INJUSTICE?

HAS MY FICTICIOUS NIGHTMARE EVER COME TRUE.

SPUTTER FACTOR

CONSIDERING THE SOURCE, A NEWSLETTER OF THE AARP ( AMERICAN ASSOCIATION OF RETIRED PERSONS). I'M NOT OVERLY SURPRISED AT AN AD FOR A HOVEROUND WHICH REEKS OF THE SPIRIT OF "INDEPENDENCE" FOR THE ELDERLY. THE INDEPENDENT SPIRIT IS REVERED IN THE AARP IN ITS ESSAYS ABOUT KEEPING ACTIVE, EXERCISING, CHALLENGING ONESELF INTO RETIREMENT, TAKING CHANCES AND LIVING DANGEROUSLY. BUT INCLUDED IN THIS AD WAS A GIRL ON ROLLER SKATES BESIDE THE ELDERLY PERSON IN HER WHEELCHAIR. THIS INCONGRUITY TRIGGERED MY SPUTTER FACTOR. WHAT CAN A SANE ADULT THINK ABOUT - MUCH LESS SPEAK TO - A CHILD ENCASED IN 'PROTECTIVE' ARMOR? WITH KNEE PADS, ELBOW PADS, A HELMET AND HER ANKLES BRACED, WHAT FUN COULD ANY RESPECTABLE CHILD EXPECT ON THE BOARDWALK WHEN THE FEAR FACTOR IS MISSING? ZERO! WHO MANDATED THIS OVERLY PROTECTIVE FOOLISHNESS? HOW WILL COCOON BABIES GROW UP TO BE INDEPENDENT ADULTS AFTER SUFFERING SUCH CHILD ABUSE FROM ARTIFICIAL ASSISTANTS AT THE HANDS OF THEIR PROTECTORS?

SPEAKING OF THE INDEPENDENT SPIRIT, THIS VERVE OF "VIVE" ALSO CHARACTERIZES THOSE HUMAN BEINGS WHO PUT THEIR HIGHLY EVOLVED BRAINS INTO REMISSION BY JOGGING. EACH TIME A RUNNER POUNDS THE PAVEMENT IN THAT CONTACT SPORT - MINUS BODY ARMOR - HE OR SHE CATERS TO A DELUSION OF PHYSICAL FITNESS AT THE EXPENSE OF A STARVING MIND. IT IS ABOUT TIME SOMEONE TOOK JOGGERS TO TASK. IMAGINE MY SPUTTER FACTOR WHEN I HEARD THAT AN ALLIGATOR DID JUST THAT, STOPPED A JOGGER IN HER TRACKS. THEN IT DID WHAT CAME NATURALLY. TOO BAD THE LIFE OF THIS POOR WOMAN LACKED A THOUGHT INFESTED STYLE.

BOBBLING AGAIN

IF I'VE BENT IT ONCE, I'VE BENT IT MORE THAN TWICE, BOBBLED LEFT AND BOBBLED RIGHT, BUT TO LISTEN TO AN ASSISTANT PRINCIPAL OR SCHOOL ADMINISTRATOR, I PAY THE PRICE - EVERY TIME. THEY CONTINUALLY AND PREDICTABLY PUT THEIR USELESSNESS INTO WORDS. A LOCAL POOH BAH WAS DISCUSSING A NEW MENTOR PROGRAM AT A NEARBY HIGH SCHOOL WHICH WOULD BE, I QUOTE, "INCORPORATING THIS YEAR ON." FRACTURED GRAMMAR IS ONLY HALF OF THE EQUATION FOR THE LOSING FORMULA OF PUBLIC EDUCATION. WITH IMPROPER SYNTAX MY MAN ALSO REFERRED TO THE "MANY PROGRAMS IS NOT OFTEN ABLE TO" TALK ABOUT. THE OTHER HALF OF THE EQUATION FOR FAILURE IS EXEMPLIFIED BY THIS MENTOR PROGRAM WHICH PUT OLDER STUDENTS IN FRONT OF CLASSES TO "TEACH" AND, I QUOTE AGAIN, "GIVE A FACE TO RELATE TO." EVEN THOUGH, TYPICALLY, CORRECT ENGLISH IS DISSED BY THESE EDUCATORS, WHAT'S MORE TROUBLING IS THE INGRAINED SYSTEM WITH PRIORITIES TOPSY-TURVY AND ACADEMIC ACHIEVEMENT RELEGATED TO THE BOTTOM OF THE MUST DO LIST. STUDENTS, I QUOTE MY MAN AGAIN, "CAN EXCEL ACADEMICALLY WITH CLUBS." REALLY! AS THIS MAN'S MOUTH WAS MULTITASKING, I REALIZED IT SOUNDED OUT THE THE FAILED EDUCATIONAL EQUATION IN TODAY'S SCHOOLS THAT ACTIVITY TRUMPS THOUGHT. ACTIVITIES FOR SOCIALIZATION, IN SPORTS AND WITH COMMUNITY SPIRIT ARE PARAMOUNT. THE LONELY ART OF STUDYING (WITH MUCH MANDATORY HOMEWORK) AND PRIVATE THINKING IS LONELY INDEED. NO WONDER I BOBBLE. ASSISTANT PRINCIPALS, ADMINISTRATORS AND PUBLIC SCHOOLS ARE SUPERFLUOUS - EXCEPT FOR GARNISHING GOVERNMENT DOLLARS. CALL ME OLD-FASHIONED, BUT I CAN ONLY CONCENTRATE ON ONE ACTION AT A TIME. WHILE MY HEAD BOBBLES, MY BRAIN CAN'T ENGAGE.

GORILLAS IN OUR MIDST

HOW CAN CULTURES WITH CREEDS OF TOLERANCE OF OTHERS' BELIEFS, OPENNESS AND TURN-THE-OTHER-CHEEK WIN THE WAR AGAINST AN ENEMY WITH A CONTRASTING IDEOLOGY? WELL, THE EUROPEAN UNION IS SEEKING AN ANSWER TO THEIR PRESENT SITUATION WITH A "NON-EMOTIONAL LEXICON" WITH WHICH TO "TALK" TO THEM. WHAT GOOD WILL IT DO TO PACIFY MUSLIM MURDERERS IN THEIR MIDST? OBEISANCE TO THEM IS A SIGN OF WEAKNESS. TALK FOR THEM IS DOUBLE-SPEAK. PACIFISM AND NON-VIOLENCE WERE HALLMARKS OF GREAT LEADERS SUCH AS MOHANDAS GANDHI, JESUS AND MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. BUT TO WHAT END? A SACRIFICIAL DEATH, MARTYRDOM WHICH IS SO DEVOUTLY WISHED BY THE JIHADISTS IN THEIR CRUSADE AGAINST US, THE INFIDELS, THE DEVILS, THREATENING THEIR WORLD. HOW THEN IS TOLERANCE ANYTHING BUT A LOSING GAME, ALTHOUGH LOSING IS NOT COMPLETELY WITHOUT ITS MERITS. GANDHI, JESUS AND REVEREND KING, EACH INSPIRED MILLIONS OF BELIEVERS AND EACH ATTAINED HIS HIGHER REWARD. TODAY, HOWEVER, THE GORILLAS HAVE COME OUT OF THE MIST. THE ENEMY, AMIDST US PRESENTS WESTERNERS WITH THE HOBSON’S CHOICE BETWEEN NON-VIOLENCE AND DEATH

FIELD OF DREAMS

A PROGRESSIVE PRESENTED HIS EXPLANATION FOR CRIME AND VIOLENCE IN AMERICA - URBAN SPRAWL. HE PONTIFICATED ABOUT HIS CENTRAL THEME OF THE "INTEGRITY OF BUILT LANDSCAPE." HE THOUGHT WE IDIOTS CALLED HOMEOWNERS WOULD BUY HIS CRAZY THEORY SUPPORTED BY SKEWED STATISTICS THAT CITY PLANNERS SHOULD RE-INSTALL SMALL TOWN LIVING SPACES WITH A FEELING OF COMMUNITY, CENTRAL SQUARES AND PUBLIC TRANSIT TO SAVE ENERGY AND THE PLANET. ABRACADABRA, AMERICA WOULD BE A WHOLLY, MORAL COUNTRY AGAIN.

I SUGGEST THAT THE CULTURE OF DEATH, THE VIOLENT ENTERTAINMENT MEDIA, RAP MUSIC, FEEL-GOOD-ISM AND THE LOSS OF THE INTACT FAMILY, NOT URBAN SPRAWL, HAVE CONTRIBUTED TO THE DESCENT OF MEN AND WOMAN. ALSO, I AM AWARE OF THE ALREADY EXISTING INTACT COMMUNITIES - ESPECIALLY IN INNER CITIES - WHERE RAMPANT CRIMES DISPROVE THIS 'DREAMER'S NOTION.

IF ARCHITECTS ACTUALLY BUILT THESE URBAN DREAM COMMUNITIES, WOULD DWELLERS COME? NO, THEY WOULD GO WEST, WEST AS MANIFESTED IN THE DESTINY OF ANY SANE RESIDENT LIVING A CROWDED, FISHBOWL EXISTENCE IN AN INNER OR BIG CITY. IT'S HUMAN NATURE! TURN 'EM LOOSE, I SAY, CITIZENS WITH THEIR MONIES, TO DECIDE WHAT CONSTITUTES THEIR DREAMS. PROGRESSIVES, HOWEVER, MASK THEIR COMMUNISTIC CONCEPTS WITH OBSCURE PHRASES LIKE "INTEGRITY OF BUILT LANDSCAPE." BY GOLLY, DESTROYING FREEDOM OF CHOICE IS NO OBSTACLE FOR THEM. I AM THANKFUL THAT I HAVE ALREADY PUT DOWN MY COUNTRY ROOTS. NO PROGRESSIVE WILL CONFISCATE MY EMINENT DOMAIN.

POETRY

LATE TO BED AND EARLY TO RISE TO SEARCH FOR ROCKS APPROPRIATE TO THE WATER DISH OF OUR HONEY BEES. OUR SPACE IS NO BEE-GLADE, BUT SPRING SWARMS HUMMED AROUND US ANYWAY. SUMMER'S HEAT AND PHASES OF DROUGHT CALL FOR A WATER TROUGH FOR OUR HIVES. POETRY BECOMES THESE TINY FEMINIST STINGERS (ONLY IF AGITATED) IF ONE COMPARES THE COMPONENTS OF ITS POETRY’S DEFINITION TO THEM - RHYTHM, RHYME, EXACT AND CREATIVE USE OF LANGUAGE, LOGIC, ROMANCE AND A COGENT THOUGHT. WOULD THAT MORE HUMANS WOULD 'HIVE' UP WITH A PROPER PERSPECTIVE ON LIFE. BEES' MASTERY OF HONEY-MAKING LEADS ME TO ASK FOR A FRESH ANSWER TO THE QUESTION, WHAT IS SPRING? I QUOTE FROM GERARD MANLEY HOPKINS, A MASTERFUL POET, WHOSE ANSWER TO THE QUERY IS, "GROWTH IN EVERY THING."

FLESH AND FLEECE, FUR AND FEATHER,
GRASS AND GREENWORLD ALL TOGETHER,
STAR-EYED STRAWBERRY-BREASTED
THROSTLE ABOVE HER NESTED

CLUSTER OF BUGLE BLUE EGGS THIN
FORMS AND WARMS THE LIFE WITHIN;
AND BIRD AND BLOSSOM SWELL
IN SOD AND SHEATH OR SHELL.

WHEN DROP-OF-BLOOD-AND-FOAM-DAPPLE
BLOOM LIGHTS THE ORCHARD-APPLE
AND THICKET AND THORP ARE MERRY
WITH SILVER-SURFED CHERRY

AND AZURING-OVER GREYBELL MAKES
WOOD BANKS AND BRAKES WASH WET LIKE LAKES
AND MAGIC CUCKOOCALL
CAPS, CLEARS, AND CLINCHES ALL-"

I CONCLUDE,

BEES' NUMINA IS POETRY SUPREME,
SEDATE, SOLICITOUS ROUND THEIR QUEEN
HIVE'S FOR SWEETEST COMB,
SPRING’S UP ANEW AT HOME.

WITNESS TO HOPE

JUST WHEN I READ THAT A CONFERENCE OF SOCIAL SCIENCE EXPERTS CONFIRMS MY BELIEF THAT THE SPACE FILLED BY PARENTS HAS BEEN REPLACED BY THE SCHOOLS, THE MEDIA AND THE STREETS AND JUST WHEN I WONDER HOW MUCH WORSE OUR UNMORAL REALITY CAN GET, I ENCOUNTER SOME ENCOURAGING INFORMATION REGARDING OUTSTANDING INDIVIDUALS LEADING FRUITFUL LIVES. I AM WITNESS TO HOPE.

TWIN BROTHERS FROM A DEVOUT, CATHOLIC FAMILY OF THIRTEEN CHILDREN HAVE JUST BEEN ORDAINED PRIESTS. THE POPE SAYS THAT COME HELLISH HERESY OR TSUNAMIS OF COMPLAINTS, THE CATHOLIC CHURCH WILL NOT ALTER ITS POSITION THAT CHRISTIANITY IS A REVELATION AND CHRIST'S RESURRECTION IS ITS CENTRAL FACT. THE CHAIRMAN OF THE JOINT CHIEFS OF STAFF IS A CAREER MARINE AND A PRACTICING CATHOLIC WHO DEPENDS ON GOD DAILY. THE ST. VINCENT DE PAUL SOCIETY, ALIVE AND WELL, STILL RECOGNIZES SPECIAL VOLUNTEERS FOR THEIR CHARITABLE WORKS, LIKE A LOCAL WOMAN, MARRIED FOR 51 YEARS WHO STILL KEEPS HER FAITH.

I'LL LEAVE DISCOURAGEMENT AT THE TOMORROW'S DOOR EVEN AFTER HEARING ABOUT ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF SOCIETAL FAILURE, PATRICK KENNEDY. ONE BAD APPLE WON'T SPOIL MY BUSHEL FILLED WITH EXAMPLES OF GOOD.

DEAR MADELINE

JUST AS A CHEETAH NEVER SHEDS ITS ROSETTES, LIBERALS, ALSO KNOWN AS PROGRESSIVES, NEVER CHANGE. THEIR NARRATIVE IS PREDICTABLE; THEIR FRAMING DOWN PAT. DEAR MADELINE ALBRIGHT, SECRETARY OF STATE UNDER PRESIDENT BILL CLINTON, WE CONSERVATIVES CAN SEE THROUGH YOUR WORLD VIEW BECAUSE IT IS AS TRANSPARENT IN ITS CONTRADICTIONS AS ITS MUDDLED THINKING IS OPAQUE. WHEN YOU ASSERT THAT PRESIDENT GEORGE BUSH WORRIES YOU WITH HIS SINCERE RELIGIOSITY AND ADHERENCE TO MORAL PRINCIPLES - AND THAT HE WON'T SHAKE THEM - YOU DISREGARD HISTORY AND JETTISON THE FAITH ADHERED TO BY AMERICA'S FOUNDING FATHERS. LIBERALS ALWAYS TALK AND ACT WITH NON-CONSISTENCY. FOR EXAMPLE, THEY PASS ONE LAW AGAINST FLAG BURNING BUT ANOTHER FOR REMOVAL OF REFERENCES OR PRAYER TO THE GOD(PROVIDENCE) OF OUR ANCESTORS. GOD, BY THE WAY, PRECEDED THE FLAG IN OUR NATION'S HISTORY. YOU WORRY BECAUSE YOU THINK PRESIDENT BUSH BELIEVES THAT HE HAS A 'MANDATE' FROM GOD TO SPREAD DEMOCRACY AROUND THE GLOBE AND THAT ALL PEOPLES ARE INNATELY DESIROUS OF FREEDOM. DOES THIS BELIEF IN LIBERTY SANCTIONED BY GOD NOT SOUND LIKE WORDS FROM A DECLARATION OF ONE NATION'S INDEPENDENCE? THE LOSS OF A RELIGIOUSLY DICTATED MORALITY, MADAME ALBRIGHT, EXPLAINS AMERICA'S SLOUGH. CLINTON, HIS CABINET, HIS ADMINISTRATION AND A LIBERAL PHILOSOPHY HELPED TO MIRE US THERE.

BOBBLING AGAIN

I WAS SO HOPING TO AVOID WHIPLASH. BUT I MISTAKENLY LISTENED TO A SCHOOL OFFICIAL AGAIN. HE PROVED THAT THE DISTINGUISHED INTELLECTUAL, ROBERT HUTCHINS FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO, WAS A FOOL WHEN HE SAID, "MOST OF THE IMPORTANT THINGS THAT A HUMAN BEING OUGHT TO KNOW CANNOT BE COMPREHENDED IN YOUTH." THIS SCHOOL OFFICIAL NOT ONLY PROVED THAT NO CHILD WILL LEARN ANYTHING AS A YOUTH IN A PUBLIC SCHOOL, BUT ALSO NO ADULT HAS LEARNED ANYTHING IMPORTANT WHO TEACHES IN OR ADMINISTERS THE SAME. THIS EDUCATOR "TRULY BELIEVED" IN THE STUPID INITIATIVES HE DESCRIBED. HE ALSO ADMITTED THAT IF AN INITIATIVE WAS NOT FUNDED, IT WAS "DIFFICULT." IN OTHER WORDS, THE PUBLIC SHOULD LET THE GOVERNMENT TAKE EVER MORE OF TAXPAYER'S MONIES TO PAY FOR PROGRAMS HE CAN BRAG ABOUT.

OF WHAT DO I SPEAK? THE FIRST STUPID INITIATIVE IS THE NEW WELLNESS COMMITTEE WHICH HOPES TO TACKLE THE PROBLEM OF CHILDHOOD OBESITY. ONLY WITH A PHYSICALLY FIT BODY CAN THE CHILD POSSESS AN ALERT BRAIN. WHAT RUBBISH! REMEMBER ST. THOMAS AQUINAS OR SOCRATES OR ISAAC NEWTON OR EINSTEIN? GREAT THINKERS, YES? DID THEY WORRY ABOUT PROPER NUTRITION AND EXERCISE? ONE INNOVATION WILL BE TO CUT STUDENT BREAKS OF 15 MINUTES EACH FROM 3 TO 2 FOR THE SCHOOL DAY. ANOTHER INNOVATION WILL BE A WALKING COMPETITION REWARDED WITH PRIZES FOR MILES MARCHED BY CHILDREN AROUND THE GROUNDS. WHY CAN'T CHILDREN BE ALLOWED TO DO WHAT'S NATURAL -RUN AMOK?

THE SECOND STUPID INITIATIVE IS A NEW FAMILY RESOURCE TEACHER WHO WILL HELP PUPILS BECOME MORE COMPASSIONATE, TOLERANT, SAFE, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, AND WELL-ROUNDED. STUPID TEACHER MAN SAYS THIS IS TRULY IMPORTANT TOO. I'M POSITIVE THAT HE REALIZES THAT PARENTS ARE USELESS NOWADAYS AND THE GOAL OF PUBLIC EDUCATION IS TO MOLD THE IDEAL GUILT-RIDDEN AND FEMINIZED STUDENT. WHY CAN'T YOUNG PEOPLE BE PERMITTED TO DO WHAT COMES NATURALLY - COMPETE?

THE THIRD IS THE WIDESPREAD USE OF THE FREE BREAKFAST PROGRAM. REGARDING THIS, AT LEAST THE PARENTS ARE NOT STUPID. WHAT SELF-RESPECTING, LAZY ADULT WOULDN'T TAKE ADVANTAGE OF A FREE MEAL THAT RESULTS IN MORE TIME FOR ONESELF? STUPID TEACHER MAN, HOWEVER, REMINDS ME THAT ON AN EMPTY STOMACH IT'S HARDER TO LEARN. WILL SOMEONE REMIND HIM THAT SKIPPING BREAKFAST IS STANDARD PROCEDURE FOR MANY ADOLESCENTS AND ADULTS? IS IT NOT OBVIOUS THAT NEITHER CHILDREN NOR PARENTS HAVE CORRECT THINKING ABOUT WHAT SHOULD COME TO THEM NATURALLY IN THE MORNING - A BREAKING OF THE FAST? AS MR. HUTCHINS FORGOT TO OBSERVE ABOUT ADULTHOOD - SOME ADULTS NEVER LEARN. WITH NO EMPHASIS ON OR TIME FOR ACADEMICS IN ANY PUBLIC SCHOOL WHAT CAN MY COMMITTEE OF ONE FOR COMMON SENSE ACCOMPLISH?

THIS IS MY SECOND ATTEMPT TO SOLICIT YOUR RESPONSE. LIKE A SALMON SWIMMING UPSTREAM, I KNOW I FACE AN UPHILL BATTLE. I DO NOT DISPUTE YOUR CRUSADE FOR 'WHAT IS BEST' FOR CHILDREN. I CHALLENGE THE UNIVERSAL APPLICATION OF YOUR ADVICE. MY QUESTION TO YOU IS, "IF ALL MOTHERS MUST REMAIN AT HOME UNTIL CHILDREN ARE 18, WHAT PLACE EXISTS FOR THE EDUCATION OF WOMEN? BARRING THE CHOICES OF NUNHOOD AND SPINSTERHOOD, DR. LAURA, YOU ESPOUSE THAT MOTHERHOOD CALLS FOR A TOTAL COMMITMENT TO THE HOME WITHOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF INTELLECTUAL PAROLE. YOUR REPEATED ADVICE IS THAT NO WOMAN MAY ENTER THE WORKFORCE, APPROPRIATE A COLLEGE DEGREE OR PURSUE A MEANINGFUL CAREER, BECAUSE SHE MUST STAY AT HOME UNTIL THE CHILDREN REACH THE AGE OF 18. HOWEVER, COMMON SENSE SAYS THAT AT THIS POINT IN HER LIFE, AFTER ONE, TWO, 6 OR 10 CHILDREN, A MOTHER WILL NOT BE READY, WILLING OR ABLE TO PURSUE BEGIN A HIGHER EDUCATION OR A WORTHWHILE CAREER. COMMON SENSE, DR. LAURA IS THE OPERATIVE WORD. IRONICALLY MY BLOG SITE, BEGUN LAST YEAR IS TITLED 'UNCOMMON SENSE'. tcminc.blogspot.com

HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN YOUR POSITION THAT WOMEN ARE UNNECESSARY IN ANY JOB MARKET OR FOR ANY CAREER ENDEAVOR? EVEN PRIOR TO THE FEMINISTS' MOVEMENT TO GAIN SUFFRAGE, WOMEN COULD BE EMPLOYED IN THE WORKFORCE TO A LIMITED DEGREE. BUT YOUR MODERN SOLUTION TO THE PROBLEM OF IMPROPER PARENTING IS TO PUT THE IMPROPER PARENT BACK INTO THE HOME. MEANWHILE, OUT IN SOCIETY, NO TEACHERS, NO SCIENTISTS, NO ARTISTS, NO ACADEMICS, NO BUSINESS OWNERS, NO ENTREPRENEURS OF INDUSTRY OF THE FEMALE PERSUASION EXIST. I GRANT THAT ENTRY LEVEL JOBS AND MEANINGLESS PAYCHECKS ARE UNNECESSARY FOR MOST YOUNG, WORKING WOMEN BECAUSE MOST OF THEM ARE INCAPABLE OF OR UNFIT FOR THEM ANYWAY. BUT THEY AREN'T PREPARED FOR MOTHERING EITHER. WHAT ABOUT THE FEW, THE PROUD, THE THINKING?

IT'S A FACT, DR. LAURA, THAT MOST MOTHERS TODAY DO NOT KNOW HOW TO BE MOTHERS. THEY HAVE NOT A CLUE HOW TO PASS THE TIME PROFITABLY FOR A DAY. THEY CARE LITTLE FOR HOUSEWORK OR DOMESTIC PURSUITS. WHAT WILL THESE CHILDREN WITH CHILDREN DO TO PASS TIME? COOK? CLEAN? SOCIALIZE? SHOP? TEACH PHONICS? PLEASE THEIR MEN? READ? CRUISE THE HIGHWAYS? SEEK SEXUAL GRATIFICATION? PARENT? YOU PICK. ARE YOU UNAWARE OF THESE REALITIES?

DR. LAURA, UNFORTUNATELY, LIKE A LIBERAL, YOU HAVE YOUR WORLD VIEW - GRANTED IT'S FROM THE ELITE PERSPECTIVE OF A WOMAN WHO PURSUED A CAREER BEFORE SHE DELIVERED HER ONLY CHILD AT FORTY. IN THE PAST YOU HAVE NOT RESPONDED TO MY OBJECTION AND OBSERVATONS, BECAUSE THEY WOULD NECESSITATE A DEVIATION FROM YOUR MAJOR PREMISE, THAT WOMEN BELONG IN THE HOME. MAY I REMIND YOU AGAIN THAT MOST NUBILE GIRLS ARE SCHLEPS COMPARED WITH YOU. MOST WHO HAVE CHOSEN TO CREATE OFFSPRING SHOULD KEEP THE HOME FIRES LIT AND BABY HAPPY, BUT REALTY THAT KEEPS REARING ITS UGLY AND UNFIT HEAD IS THAT MOST DO NOT.

I ADMIRE YOU AS A CHAMPION OF INTELLIGENT CHOICES, RESPONSIBILITY, THE WELFARE OF CHILDREN AND CONVENTIONAL MORALITY. BUT I DO NOT ADMIRE YOU AS A FEMINIST WHO PUTS TRUTH SECONDARY TO AGENDA. YOUR AGENDA, THE WELFARE OF CHILDREN, BLINDS YOU TO THE FACT THAT ALL WOMEN CANNOT, SHOULD NOT STAY AT HOME FOR 18YRS OR PERMANENTLY. SOME WOMEN HAVE A RIGHT AND A NEED FOR BOTH CHILDREN AND AN EDUCATION AND/OR CAREER. AREN'T YOU DENYING WOMEN THAT CHOICE? THE CORRESPONDING DUTY TO THE RIGHT TO HAVE CHILDREN DOES NOT NECESSITATE THAT WOMEN REMAIN PERMANENTLY AT HOME.

ON TODAY'S SHOW, WED. MAY 4TH, 2006, YOU PRAISED A DIVORCED WOMAN WITH 2 NATURAL CHILDREN AND 2 FOSTER CHILDREN WHO WORKED FULL TIME OUTSIDE THE HOME. I WAS SURPRISED. MY - OH SO MUCH MORE PERCEPTIVE AND INTELLIGENT THAN MOST MEN ON THE PLANET - HUSBAND IMMEDIATELY QUESTIONED THE FACT THAT A WORKING, DIVORCED MOTHER WAS GIVEN FOSTER CHILDREN. YOU LET THIS PASS. I FEAR YOU WILL PASS TOO ON ANSWERING MY QUESTION - IN MY EVER SO HUMBLE, UNFEMINIST OPINION.

MIMUS POLYGLOTTOS

SUCH A TINY GLOTTIS
WITH FABULOUS, FERVENT NOTES,
NECTAR FOR A PROSPECTIVE MATE.
TOPMOST ON A TREE BRANCH
OR HIGH ATOP A BARN,
YOURS THE TEENIEST GULLET
FEEDS MY SOUL WITH SONG,
'TANT MIEUX' AM I TODAY,
DRAB MOCKINGBIRD IN GREY.

BEES' DAY

MAYDAY, MAYDAY, IT’S A FINE SPRING DAY TODAY FOR SWARMS - THE RAISON D'ETRE FOR BEES. I WITNESSED FOUR SWARMS, BUZZING BUT ORGANIZED MEANDER UNTIL THEY HUNG QUIETLY IN SELECTED PLACES IN MY BACK YARD. THREE DARKENED THE BRANCHES OF TREES; ONE HOVERED ON THE GROUND. THOUSANDS OF WORKERS SURROUNDED THEIR RESPECTIVE QUEENS, LIKE BEES TO HONEY, THEIR MISSION TO PERPETUATE A HONEY-COMBED LIFE. THIS MYSTERY OF SWARMS AND THE COMMUNAL LIFE OF BEES, CONTINUE TO FASCINATE APIARISTS AND APPRECIATORS. BEARS AND MAN ALIKE, DELIGHT IN THE SWEET GOLD OF HEAVENLY HONEY. ONLY THE CREATOR OF BEES UNDERSTANDS THEIR RAISON D’ETRE.